


A Blossom, A Serpent and a Paper Moon

by TheMadSquid



Category: Fate/stay night (Visual Novel), Soul Eater
Genre: Gen, Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-04
Updated: 2018-09-30
Packaged: 2019-06-21 12:27:07
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,445
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15557697
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheMadSquid/pseuds/TheMadSquid
Summary: Meister Sakura Tohsaka and her weapon partner Rider leave Japan to join the DWMA. This series will follow their adventures, as they try to turn Rider into a death scythe.





	1. Chapter 1

The grinning moon watched over the city below. Darkness had fallen, street lamps emitted an orange glow onto the cobble streets. Down these streets, walked a lone hooded man. He was wielding a blood-soaked knife, his crazed eyes emitted a faint red glow as he looked forwards, smiling just like the moon. A feminine voice echoed throughout the streets. "David the Chopper!" He turned around and saw two girls standing underneath the lamp behind him. It was meister Sakura Tohsaka and her weapon partner Rider. The source of the voice, Sakura, pointed to him. "You've been preying on innocent human souls! In the name of Lord Death, I will defeat you here!"  
In response, David merely made an animal-like snarl and readied his knife. Seeing this, Sakura knew he wouldn't back down, for he had lost nearly all his humanity. She narrowed her eyes. "Rider, you know what to do." Her partner said nothing, but merely nodded before going into weapon form. In Sakura's hands, were now two nail-like daggers with long chains attached to them.  
Sakura threw her left dagger, the chain's loop on her wrist. The murderer was narrowly able to deflect the flying nail, before charging forwards. His knife and her right dagger clashed, making a metallic clang. He swung the short blade frantically, only for it to be blocked each time. He got frustrated, and attempted to thrust it into Sakura's heart as a final move. This proved fatal, for the purple-haired girl simply swung down, knocking the blade from the madman's grip. By the time this happened, the fight was practically finished. She had him right where he needed to be. She kicked off the ground to distance herself and called back the dagger she'd thrown. The sound of chains was heard, before the dagger pierced his heart. His body disintegrated, until all that was left was the crimson orb that was his soul.  
Rider went back into human form and went to retrieve the kishin egg. After grabbing it from the air, she proceeded to eat it. Swallowing it whole, she let out a sigh. Sakura puffed with pride. "Ah, yet another soul taken! We've been doing well, haven't we?" Rider turned and gave her a smile. "Yes, I must admit we've recently improved." "Let's see…" She scratched her head. "How many souls do we have, again?" "Hold on,"  
Rider took a notebook and pen out of her pocket. Sakura ran up to peer over her shoulders. Their height different made this difficult; even standing on her toes she could barely see over. Rider narrowed her eyes as she tried to decipher the roman numerals on the paper. "Let's see, adding another one…" She muttered, as she drew in a dash. "That means we should be at…" She glanced behind her. "25" "25?! So, we're a quarter of the way to making you a death scythe!" "Yes, I believe so." "Oh, this is so exciting! Hey, maybe we should celebrate! It is a Friday, after all." "Well, 25 isn't actually that impressive but…" She couldn't help but smile at her partner's enthusiasm. In any case, she was curious as to what kind of celebration they would have. "what do you propose?" "There's this new recipe I've been dying to try! I've been saving it since it's difficult to make, and this is the perfect excuse!" "You mean that Chinese dish you found online?" "Yes, I'll be sure to buy the ingredients tomorrow morning so we can have it for dinner!" "Well then, I'll look forward to eating it." The team left the scene, making small talk as they returned to their apartment.  
The following Monday, the team was making their way to the mission bulletin board at the school. On the way, they bumped into some familiar faces: Maka and Soul, the team they'd recently become acquainted with. "Oh, hey" Soul greeted with a raised hand. "Been a few days, how've you two been?" Sakura responded, "Well, we've been doing pretty good. We're up to 25 souls as of now." Maka smiled, "Hey, not too bad." "Yeah, not as good as your number, though. Have you captured that witch soul yet?" "Uh..." Maka shifted her gaze off to the side to avoid eye contact. "not yet, we're working on it though..." Sakura tilted her head in curiosity. "Really? I could've sworn I heard something about you fighting a witch." "Well, we did but..." Finally Soul just gave an honest answer. "We screwed up and we're back to 0 again." "Really? What happened?" They both sighed whilst hanging their heads in shame. Soul then gave a vague answer, "I really don't want to talk about it, but let's just say you should never get witches and cats confused." Sakura, not sure to react to such an odd statement, just chuckled nervously.  
After a brief pause, Rider adjusted her glasses. "Well" She said. "we'd best get to the bulletin, before all the good missions are taken." Sakura nodded. "Yes, sorry if we're being rude but we really should get going." She bowed politely. "It was nice talking to you!"  
They observed the various missions on the board. They didn't see too many that jumped out, until Rider took notice of one towards the top. "This one describes a weapon and meister team eating human souls in Death City." "Are they former students?" "It doesn't say anything about that, but apparently the team consists of a young girl and a 'monster'. I must say that I am intrigued as to what sort of creature this monster is. Should we take this mission?" "I don't see why not. The board is pretty sparse today, anyway."  
With their mission decided, the two waited until night fell to begin their search. Rider rode her white motorcycle (which she'd affectionately named "Pegasus") around town, as Sakura kept an eye out for anything out of the ordinary. The paper said that one of them was a "monster" so she figured they wouldn't be hard to spot. As they passed the graveyard, she told Rider to stop. "What is it?" "I think I saw somebody moving…" "Someone in a graveyard at night? How unusual..." "We should investigate, it might be what we're looking for."  
Rider parked the vehicle on the curb, and the team made their way past the iron gates. The place was entirely silent, save for the choir of crickets. They both looked around cautiously, wondering if what Sakura had seen was truly the target in question. Just as she was beginning to doubt herself, she heard something unusual: singing. It was faint initially, but soon she was able to make out words. "I think that the waves will devour~"  
As the voice grew closer, she turned to face its source. "Both boat and man, by and by…and that, with her dulcet-voiced power," She saw a young girl in a purple winter coat. In her hand, was a massive axe-sword. The weapon was almost as big as the one wielding it. Despite this, she was not only lifting it off the ground, but was carelessly swinging it around. She stopped walking, as she sang the last verse of her song. "was done by the Lorelei~"  
The singing stranger looked curiously at the girls before her. "Oh, who is this? Is it another…no. Your soul is uncorrupted it seems." She giggled. "Ah, how rude of me. I almost forgot about introductions." Her weapon turned into "human" form, but what came out hardly appeared as such. He was a towering giant, the girl next to him hardly reached up to his knees. He stood there still and silent, like a stone statue. "A young girl and a monster," Sakura thought. "this must be them."  
The girl curtsied. "Guten tag. My name is Illyasviel von Einzbern. But if that's too long, you can just call me Illya. Happy to meet your acquaintance." She gestured to the towering figure beside her. "This is my weapon, Heracles. I apologize for his silence, he isn't much of a talker I'm afraid." Sakura regained her composure. "Uhm…my name is Sakura Tohsaka. I'm a meister from the DWMA. This is Rider, my weapon partner."  
Rider leaned down to whisper in her partner's ear. "There's no doubt that this is them. Can you see their souls?" Sakura whispered back. "Yes, hold on." She used soul perception and immediately she could tell something wasn't right. "Illya's soul is strange, something about it seems…off. I can't put my finger on it, but it's almost like her wavelength is artificial." "What about her weapon?" "He…" She paused. "What is it?" "Heracles's soul is…it's full of rage and bloodshed. It's like nothing I've seen before."  
"Ignoring your rude whispering," Illya interrupted, an offended look on her face. "something has caught my attention. You say that you're from the DWMA?" "Yes…" "I have been informed about your kind. My maids told me to test out my new weapon on other people, but they said attacking someone from the DWMA was forbidden. That's no fun though, and I must admit I'd like to see how well you do against my weapon. Yes…" She laughed, "Let's kill them, Heracles!". Her voice was so cheerful, like a child about to play a game.  
Heracles grunted, before morphing back into an axe-sword. Seeing that a fight was imminent, Sakura exclaimed. "Rider, daggers!" Not 5 seconds after Rider went into weapon form, Illya swung her axe-sword. Sakura managed to dodge the blade, but just barely. Having narrowly avoided the attack, she tried to retaliate. Before she could, the girl swung the blade again, smashing it into a tombstone. Sakura jumped back, trying to make more distance between them. "I'm surprised," Rider observed, somehow managing to keep her cool. "even though her weapon is so big, she moves very quickly." Illya ran towards the team, forcing Sakura to keep falling back. "She's not leaving much of an opening." Sakura thought. "I can't win like this, I have to think of something!" She ran possible options through her head, all the while flying from the earth-shattering swings.  
The great stone guillotine smashed into the tree, and Sakura dodged by a hairs-breadth. Illya's assault was halted. In the collision, Heracles had gotten lodged into the trunk. "Wai-hey!" The girl cried. "Heracles, how could you get stuck like that?!" In response, her weapon made a guttural groaning. "Don't blame the trees, this is completely your fault!"  
This setback was minor, but it was enough for Sakura to get more distance between her and her target. "Sakura," Rider said. "she is too strong, we must use soul resonance." Sakura furrowed her eyebrows. "We haven't mastered that just yet but…I don't know what else we can do." "We've practiced this; I have confidence that we will succeed." The purple-haired girl lowered her head. She released a sigh, mentally preparing herself for the gamble she was about to make. "Rider, are you ready?" "Yes."  
They shouted in unison. "Let's go, Soul Resonance!" Their souls began to resonate like the notes of a song, and a sanguine glow emitted from their bodies. The two were connected before, but now they were becoming more synced than ever. Finally getting Heracles free, Illya looked curiously at what was transpiring before her. "Oh, Sella told me about this…" She giggled and raised her weapon. "Now I get to see what these students can really do! What an exciting day!" The daggers began to glow with a pale light. Sakura leaped forwards with a speed never seen in her before, launching towards Illya like a white comet. The sound of metal clashing on metal echoed throughout the graveyard.  
Heracles let out a loud roar, as Illya used him to defend against the hurtling flurry of daggers. The sheer force of the attack had knocked her back a little, but she stood firm. The crimson-eyed girl cried and swung with great force. Sakura was knocked back, the momentum of her attack sending her flying. She rolled on the ground, finally stopping near a tombstone.  
Illya walked towards her collapsed foe. Before she could get any closer, Rider went back into human form and shielded Sakura's body. She glared at the girl before them, her intense gaze shining through her glasses. "I will not allow you to come any closer!" Illya looked at them with disappointment in her eyes. "Is this really all Death has? I thought for sure he would have more to throw at me than this…" Rider gritted her teeth, trying to hold back her anger. Illya sighed. "This isn't worth my time." She looked off to the distance. "I guess I'll just head home early tonight." Her gaze returned to the girls in front of her. "Well, it was fun anyway. Even if it was only brief…" With those final words, she walked off and soon faded into the dark streets.  
The threat now gone, Rider returned her attention to her meister. "Sakura, are you alright?" She slowly rose to her feet, her hand on her head. "I'm fine" She muttered, a bit of tension in her voice. "You seem hurt…did you hit your head?" "No, it's nothing. I just hit my head a little." "Let me see…" Rider leaned in and checked the spot that had been hit. "The bruise is minor, but we should still bandage it up just be safe."  
The two began walking back to their parked bike. "I knew we'd mess up…" Sakura muttered. "What do you mean?" "The Soul Resonance. I knew we hadn't gotten it right yet, but I did it anyway. And now because of my mistake, that Illya girl is still out there feasting on souls." "I do not think it is that simple. We were fighting a strong opponent, and this is still our first semester. There wasn't much we could do here." Rider patted her on the head. "You've become more optimistic recently, you shouldn't get yourself down now." Sakura returned her gesture with a soft smile. "Thank you, Rider."  
They silently got back onto the motorcycle, then drove off. There was a silence between them for a few moments. Finally, Sakura broke the silence. "You were right." She said, holding tightly to her driver. "I've promised that I'm going to make you a death scythe. I won't let a defeat like this hold me back." Rider smiled. "It makes me happy to hear you say that. Yes, even if we fail many times, we can't give up." A twinkle of determination returned to Sakura's eyes, as they rode under the grinning moon.


	2. Chapter 2

Sakura and Rider walked through the tunnel of torii gates, as they made their way into the Death Room. “I wonder what Lord Death wants us for?” Sakura wondered. “Do you think he has a mission for us?” “Perhaps. But then, being called into this room isn’t always a good thing. I’m a little worried…” “Well, we haven’t done anything wrong that I can remember. So, we should be fine, right?”  
Walking onto the platform, they were met by the grim reaper himself. The dark figure raised a ridiculously large hand and greeted them in a cheerful tone. “Why hello, hello! Good to see ya~!” They both bowed. “Good evening, Lord Death.” “I hear you’ve both been quite well for yourselves. Packaged 30 souls on your first semester, not bad at all!” “Thank you, Lord Death.” “Anyway, I suppose I should explain why I called you in here in the first place. We have a special mission for you, where you’ll have to team up with Rin and Archer. We’ve already informed them about this and they’ve agreed to it. Now we just need your cooperation.” “A mission for me and Nee-san?” He nodded. “Indeed. Some of our teachers have noticed that the two of you are rather distant. However, there is no denying that both of you possess great potential as meisters and have powerful weapon partners to boot. If you can try and rekindle your sisterly bond, the four of you can make an amazing team. So, we’ve decided to send both of you on a ‘bonding mission’ of sorts. We hope that it will at least be a push in the right direction. Still, you are free to refuse if you wish.” Sakura looked to Rider. “What are your thoughts?” “I do not think it is my place to decide. But as your weapon, I will follow along with whatever decision you make.” Sakura didn’t have to think over it very long before she gave her response.  
“I will do it.” “Good! Now, regarding the mission itself: there have been numerous reports of killings in an Iranian town. We’ve determined that it is the doing of a weapon named Hassan I Sabbah. I’d advise you both to be careful, as he’ll no doubt prove formidable. But with your combined efforts I’m sure things will turn out fine!” “I understand.”  
As they left the Death Room, Rider looked to her meister. “I did notice that myself. Though, I’ve been reluctant to bring it up.” “Noticed what?” “Your relationship with Miss Tohsaka. It seems that the two of you hardly talk to each other at all.” “I guess so, but it isn’t intentional or anything. We’ve just been busy with our own stuff.” “I can understand that. Still, perhaps this mission will help the two of you.” “Perhaps…”  
After arriving in Iran, the team made their way towards the local mosque, the designated meeting place. They saw Rin sitting next to the fountain outside the looming masjid. Her weapon, Archer, stood beside her.  
“Good to see you finally made it.” Rin greeted. Sakura bowed slightly. “Sorry, we ended up running a little late.” “It’s fine. Besides, we haven’t done much ourselves; we’ve just been waiting out here for you two to show up.” “Oh, so the weapon hasn’t shown himself yet?” “No, but the night has only just begun. I think if we wait around long enough, he’ll eventually turn up. After all, we’re easy prey.” Sakura tilted her head. “Why do you say that?” “Think about it: as far as he knows, we’re just ordinary people. We’re out here vulnerable, easy kills.” “Ah, so we’re using ourselves as bait?” Rin smiled. “Exactly!”  
Sakura and Rider joined Rin next to the fountain. “Hey Archer,” Sakura said. “you can to sit if you want to.” Archer simply shook his head. “No, I’ve been sitting around all day. I need to stretch my legs a little.” After he said this, Sakura began gazing at him curiously. Archer, noticing this, looked at her somewhat uncomfortably. “What?” “Now that I’m looking at you…you kind of remind me of Emiya senpai. Do you two know each other?” He crossed his arms. “Hmph, I have no relationship with that man.” “Really?” “None at all.” “Sorry, I was just wondering.” Rin leaned over and whispered, “They know each other quite well actually. They’re relationship is just…complicated. Best not to pry for now.” “Oh, I see.” Rin shook her head. “Wait, I’m getting distracted. We still need to formulate a battle plan for when he shows up.”  
After several minutes of discussion, they managed to come up with a strategy. “Right,” Sakura nodded. “and then I go in to make the final move.” “Yes. You can manage that, right?” “I can. What do you think, Rider?” “It sounds good to me.” The tall girl shifted her eyes towards Archer. “The only thing I’m worried about is Archer’s part.” The white-haired man smirked. “Oh, you don’t need to worry about me. Even if things go wrong, I can figure a way out.”  
Rin paused a moment, then turned to Sakura. “Come to think of it,” She said. “this is the first time we’ve actually talked in a while.” “Yeah.” Sakura responded. “When I first arrived here I thought we’d work together a lot, but I guess things didn’t quite work out that way.” “I suppose it’s natural that this would happen. The teachers here are always keeping us busy with missions and tests.” “Well that shouldn’t be a problem for you. You always get A’s.” “True, but I can’t compare with Rider.” She looked to the weapon in question. “Your test scores always rank up there alongside Ox and that Maka girl.” Rider adjusted her glasses. “Well, I can’t brag. I guess you could say that learning is just something that’s important to me.”  
Suddenly, both Rin and Sakura shot up. “Do you sense that?” Rin asked, to which Sakura nodded. “Yes. It feels like there’s…” They both shifted their gaze to the mosque’s tower. Their weapons began looking around frantically, before noticing where their meisters were looking. On the balcony of the minaret, was a dark figure. The man, cloaked in black, leapt from the tower and struck down like a falcon. Both weapons jumped to the side, pushing their meisters out of the way. Missing his target, the man raised to his full height. With an onyx body and a skull-like mask, he looked similar to Death himself. After getting up and brushing herself off, Rin pointed to the man before them. “So, it’s you; Hassan I Sabbah!” The man was silent. “Not much of a talker I see. No matter, we’ll dispatch of you quickly and be on our way. Archer?” Scratching his head, he nodded. “Right.” He morphed into twin blades, one black and the other white. Sakura saw the situation unfolding before her, and looked to her own weapon. “Rider, daggers.” “Yes, Sakura.” The two sisters were now poised for battle.  
Hassan finally spoke, “DWMA students? I thought you had a familiar scent. The master will be pleased when he hears of my grand feast this night.” He then let out a high-pitched shriek as he leapt towards Rin. His hand reached out of his cloak, and it morphed into a sanguine blade. Rin blocked with both swords, then managed to push him back. He landed on his feet and then swiftly pounced yet again. As Rin tried to fend him off, Sakura took this as an opportunity to jump into the fray. He noticed her approach and tried to jump back. However, he received a cut to the shoulder before he could dodge. Continuing to go on the offensive, Sakura struck yet again. He raised his arm, just barely managing to turn into a blade before the blow was struck.  
The hooded skull staggered back, feeling the bite of the serpent. “Hmph…impressive.” He muttered. “But this fight has only just begun; I will not be defeated by mere children.” He pounced again, his screeching echoing throughout the silent night. Rider’s chains swung about, hemming him in. One wrapped around his arm, causing to come crashing down from his flight. Just as Sakura was about to strike down, he jumped out of the way. Distancing himself, he reached into his cloak and threw out a hail of daggers. She was caught off guard by this, and hastily defended.  
Rin, deflecting the flying blades, smiled confidently. “Archer, did you get that?” Archer answered, “Yes, these street lamps gave me a nice look.” Then, he did something their enemy did not expect; Archer turned into the dagger that Hassan had thrown. All eyes turned to this shocking display. “Did I not say?” The red-clad meister boasted. “Archer can mimic any weapon he sees!” She threw Archer at Hassan, only for the black dart to miss its target. “Throwing your own weapon?!” Hassan laughed. “You are amongst the foolish if you,” His speech was brought to pause, as the sound of chains was heard.  
Hassan quickly found himself ensnared by the metal trap. “a distraction?!” Sakura swiftly lunged in for the kill, driving the nail into his back. The chains collapsed, as his body disintegrated; only to be replaced by his crimson soul.  
Archer turned back into human form. “See, what did I say? Everything worked out!” “Yeah, that went even better than I expected.” Sakura said. “But in any case, that was amazing! I can’t believe you can mimic weapons like that! I know you’d told me about it earlier, but actually seeing it was incredible!” “Yes, I guess it is a pretty unique power.” He said, acting like he wasn’t enjoying this praise. Rider, now back in human form, nodded in affirmation. “I must say that I find this ability quite intriguing. Is your version as powerful as the original?” “No, it’s just a copy. I can’t fully replicate another weapons power.” “I see.” She smirked. “Then I will have to keep an eye on you from now on. I cannot allow myself to be outdone.” Rin snickered. “Looks our weapons are getting competitive, Sakura.” She looked at her sister. “Oh yeah, you did pretty good today by the way. I was impressed.” Sakura lit up. “Thank you! I couldn’t have done it without your help, though. I still have a lot to learn.”  
Archer cleared his throat. “Anyway,” He said. “we should probably report to Lord Death.” Rin ran up to a window, and breathed onto it to fog it up. She then traced in, “42-42-564”. The window emitted ripples, and then an image of Lord Death appeared. “My, good to see the 4 of you calling in! I suppose you finished the job?” Rin nodded. “Yes, one kishin egg captured!” “Good! I do hope this experience will help to bring you closer together!” “Actually…I think it might have.” “Wonderful! It’s good to see students who have a half-decent familial relationship…for once.” He briefly looked to the side then exclaimed, “Well, anyway! Have a safe trip back, now! Bye, bye~!”  
After ending the call, the team left the scene. As they walked down the dark street, Sakura suddenly turned around. For a second she thought she’d sensed two powerful wavelengths. Noticing this, Rider looked back. “What is it, Sakura?” She turned back around. No longer feeling it, she shook her head. “It’s nothing, I just thought I heard something.” Glancing back a final time, she caught up with the rest of the group.  
From atop one of the buildings, stood two men. The very same souls that she’d sensed. They silently watched the team of 4 leave the scene. “He was defeated…” One calmly observed, his green hair flowing in the winds. He looked to the man behind him. “what do you think?” The blond replied with a chuckle. “I am amused; those mongrels have more to them than I thought.” “What of Hassan?” “He can be easily replaced. In any case, I am curious about those two weapons. I hesitate to say it, but they may have a glimmer of potential.” “Indeed. They could make good additions to our arsenal, we’ll have to keep an eye on them.” “Yes, but in the meantime, we will have to wait. Soon, though.” He looked to the stars above him. “We will make our move, and defeat Death.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, I just wanted to apologize for the trend of there being a long gap between chapters. A lot has been going on my life lately, so I haven't had as much time to write as I'd like. But, I'm trying to get my life more organized, so hopefully I'll get better about it in the future. Plus, I plan on making the next chapter longer than the previous ones. So, that'll give you someone to look forward to!

Sakura strolled through the library, looking at the various titles. She noticed one that piqued her interest, and took it out to read the description. Then, a familiar voice came from behind her. “Hello there.” She looked behind her to see Artoria. “Oh, hi. How’ve you been?” “Pretty good, I was just looking for a certain book. Actually, if you’ll excuse me, I think it’s on the shelf behind you.” “Oh?” Sakura stepped aside and the blonde pulled the tome out of the shelf. “Here we are.” Sakura looked over her shoulders. “Ex…cali…bur? What’s that?” “It is a holy sword, and is said to be the most powerful weapon in the world. Any who wield it will gain the ability to fly and cut through the air! It was once wielded by King Arthur, my ancestor. As a member of house Pendragon, I feel honor-bound to obtain it.” She opened the book and flipped through its pages until she got to a map. “Yes, this is its location.” She glanced to the girl behind her. “Would you like to come with me?” “Well, your description sounded pretty interesting and I’m not doing much right now so…” She grabbed Sakura by the wrist, her eyes practically glittering. “Wonderful! Let’s head out then, shall we?” “Uhm, right.”   
After several hours of traveling, they finally reached the supposed location of the holy sword. As they stared into the dank cave entrance, Sakura looked to the blonde beside her. “You’re sure this is the place, right?” “Yes, I’m certain.” She then marched into the cave, making loud splashes as she walked through the ankle-high water. “Come, we haven’t time to lose!” She called, like a military captain leading an expedition. Sakura sighed as she went to catch up with her. “I haven’t seen her this excited about something since I met her.” She thought. “Excalibur must be something incredible is she’s this passionate about it.”   
Walking further into the cave, both girls perked up with they saw a fairy. “Oh my,” Artoria observed. “I wasn’t aware fairies had occupied this place.” The small spirit flew up to the pair, greeting them with a kind smile. “hello, miss fairy.” The blonde greeted. “Do you happen to know if Excalibur is here?” In response, the fairies face contorted into an expression of absolute distain and disgust. She then proceeded to flutter off without saying a single word. Sakura looked at Artoria. “What was that about, I wonder?” In response, she crossed her arms. “I don’t know. It was rather rude either way.” She shook her head and continued on. “No matter. Let’s carry on, shall we?”   
The cave opened up to a larger room, and there the sword rested. “There it is!” Artoria’s eyes lit up with wonder as she gazed upon the holy sword. The blade’s shape, perfectly symmetrical, shone brightly in the beams of sunlight. She folded her hands. “Arthur…I shall wield this sword just as you did.” She slowly and dramatically grabbed it by the hilt; only to then pull it out like it was nothing. “Wha,” She looked a little disappointed. “Is that it? Is it mine now? That was almost too easy…” Then, the sword spoke. “Behold, young ladies! Allow me to introduce myself: I am Excalibur!” He shined brightly, as he slowly morphed into normal form. The girls spoke in unison, as they witnessed the glorious and triumphant introduction before them. “How…incredibly…” Despite the initial glamour, what stood before them was not majestic in the slightest. Instead of a dashing knight like they expected, he looked more like a 4-foot-tall manic deranged penguin with no pants. “lame.” At this point, the wonder in Artoria’s eyes was gone, and instead was replaced with confusion and disappointment; her ahoge gone from a wag to a sag. Sakura, on the other hand, looked like she wanted to say something but couldn’t.   
The weapon pointed his staff at the pair. “Tell me, where are the two of you from?” Artoria put a hand to her chest. “We are from Death’s Wea,” “Fool!” “Beg your pardon?” “My legend began in the 12’th century, you see. Would you like to hear it?” “Well, I’ve already read it many times but I suppose I could listen again.” “Very well. It began on a cold November morning. It was a tough time, just as it always was in those hot August days. I was a rough and tumble sort of fellow. I was lowly, at the bottom bin of society. Nothing like the glamorous individual you see before you now. I was always picking fights back in those cool February streets. Indeed, I a thug of sorts; a ruffian, if you will.” He began twirling his cane as he rambled endlessly. “Those around me said as much. Some said I was rough, others said I was tumble. I have no proof that anyone said that I was rough and tumble, but you see: I was so sharp that I was almost certain they thought of me as such. Even if I didn’t hear them, that is what they said. I am sure of it! Of course, how could one blame me for being so rambunctious? Everyone gets a little rowdy during July, the time when my legend began.”   
“Enough!” Artoria cried. “You don’t need to tell me your legend, then. Just…can you please become my weapon?” “You wish to wield me? Very well,” He plopped two heavy stacks of paper in front of them. “I expect you to observe each of the 1,000 provisions laid out here. I particularly look forward to your participation in the 5-hour story telling party.” Both girls gawked at the extensive list. “Even the backs have writing on them…” Sakura looked to Artoria, and she just nodded in response as her mouth gaped open.   
“Remember: every morning I have a cup of coffee with cream. Do you want to know why?” Sakura raised her hand. “Because it helps you wake up?” He pointed his cane at her, barely missing her nose in the process. “Fool! Do not interrupt me as I explain myself!” He then looked off into the distance, as if there were some vision that the two girls could not see. “Uh…hello?” He then turned to them. “Nothing bests the bitter yet simple taste of green tea.” “And?” “And that is why I always start my mornings with a cup of coffee cream! Please take great care to remember this important provision!” Sakura nodded, acting like she understood when really, she had no idea what he was talking about. “I…see…” He threw his cane up, then balanced on his nose…mouth…whatever it was. “In the afternoon, I always have afternoon tea. And in the evening, I” “Do you have herbal tea?” Excalibur paused. “What? It’s what I always drink in the evening.” “Fool! In the evening I put on my pajamas.” “What’s that got to do with what you drink?” He bounced the cane off his “nose” and caught it. “This schedule is a very important part of the 1,000 provisions.” He explained, ignoring her inquiry. “Not as important as the 5-hour story telling party, of course, but still important nonetheless!”   
Artoria lowered her gaze. “Arthur, just how did you put up with this man?” Excalibur turned his gaze to her. “What did you just say?” “Oh, I was just wondering what your relationship with Arthur was like.” “I see. As a reward for your interest in my past, I shall sing you a song!” “How is that going to answer my question?” “Fool! You haven’t the slightest idea of just how important music has been to mankind! My legend began in the 12’th century, when did yours begin?” “In the 21’st century, I guess.” “Then you’ve no right to deprive this singer of his song! Do you understand?” “I…guess so?” “Very well, then I shall begin!” He began dancing around. “Excalibur! Excalibur! Excalibur! Excalibur! From the United K, I’m looking for heaven, I’m going to California! Excalibur! Excalibur! Excalibur!”  
Meanwhile, back at the academy, Rider was looking around the library. She noticed Shirou reading something at one of the tables. “Pardon me,” She said, walking up to him. “have you seen Sakura around? She said she was coming here, but I haven’t seen her.” “I’m pretty sure I saw her heading off with Artoria somewhere. I think they were searching for Excalibur or something; Artoria was getting excited about it earlier today.” “Excalibur? I’m not sure seeing him would be wise.” “What do you mean?” “I’ve read about him before and…well…” She lowered her gaze and ran a hand through her hair. “let’s just say there’s a reason few can wield him.” Shirou blinked in confusion. “So, you don’t think they’re worthy?” “No, technically anyone can use him. But the thing is: no one can fully match soul wavelengths with him. He’s…hm, how should I put it” She thought about it for a second, then gave her answer. “his personality is intolerable.”   
“Excalibur! Excalibur! Excalibur! Excalibur! From the United K, I’m looking for heaven, I’m going to California! Excalibur! Excalibur! Excalibur!” With a final spin, he pointed his cane upwards. “Excalibur!” They both looked up, weary from the prolonged song. “…are you done?” “Yes! And with that,” He turned into weapon form and moved to Artoria’s hand. “you may carry on your legacy!” He exclaimed, as he shined brightly with holy light and grew angelic wings out of his blade. “Together we shall forge a path of peace and justice!” In response, Artoria immediately placed the sword back into the stone. “Uhm, excuse me what is this about?” “I’m afraid I haven’t the patience to deal with you. Simply put, you’re mental and are also much lamer than the legends described.” As she walked off, she had a final remark. “Arthur was an even greater hero than I imagined if he could put up with you.” He called to Sakura. “What about you, young lady? Tell you what: I’ll cut the provisions in half, just so long as you attend the 5-hour story telling party.” “Me? Oh, no. I just tagged along because I was curious; I already have a weapon partner. Besides,” She gave a sweet smile which hid a deep anger and annoyance. “if I spent too much time with you I’d probably do something drastic…” “What’s that supposed to mean? No, wait! Come back! Fine, I’ll make it 400 provisions but you absolutely must attend the 5-hour story telling party!” His offer went ignored.   
As they walked towards the cave exit, the same fairy flew up to them. “So, did you meet Excalibur?” In response, the two made an expression exactly like the one the fairy had made beforehand. “Yep…you met him.”   
The next day, Artoria and Sakura bumped into each other again, now in the company of their respective weapons. “So,” Sakura started. “decided to give up on your quest for the holy sword?” Artoria sighed in response, an accepting smile of her face. “Yes, I have. I do not need Excalibur when I already have a perfectly good sword right here.” Both weapons chuckled, silently acknowledging what they were talking about.  
“Come to think of it,” Shirou said. “weren’t you writing a report on him?” Artoria nodded, a weary look on her face. “Yes, but I’ve decided to revise it. Now it’s condensed to just one word.” “One word for a report? Seriously? What even is the word?” She cleared her throat, then gave her answer. “Fool!”


End file.
